Therapy is expensive, poppin' bubble wrap is cheap... you decide.

I'm Still Here......

2009-09-11T10:29:00.000-07:00

I know, it's been about 9 months since I've posted anything..... a LOT has taken place in my life and I reclused. My apologies, and I will try to start posting updates again in the near future. (((HUGS)))

The Day the Eagle Cried - 9/11 Memorial

2009-09-11T10:32:00.000-07:00

Many, if not most, of you know, I try to repost this every year.
I wrote it on the first anniversary after this tragedy happened.

The Day The Eagle Cried

In Steadfast Memory of 9/11/01.
By Tah-nee A. Holloway © 2002-09 ARR

A beautiful morning, that September dawn,
The sun shining down, life strolling along,
Children eating breakfast, mom straightening dad's tie,
Not knowing how shortly the nation would cry "why?"
Too soon the pain coming would be realized,
This was the day the eagle would cry...
---
Planes flying closely, their intent we'd soon know,
With loved ones held captive by terrorist foe,
Through one crash, then another, the towers did sway,
They tumbled and crumbled, then gave away,
Tears streamed down, hearts broke inside,
It was the day the eagle cried...
---
Sirens screaming, smoke climbed the skies,
Our heros ran quickly with tears in their eyes,
Firefighters determined to find & rescue,
Worked side by side with their brothers in blue,
But one loss after another, the numbers did tally,
Soul after soul walked through the Valley,
As viewers sat glued to their sets nationwide,
That terrible day the eagle cried...
---
The terror this day had only begun,
Still more crashes came, the tragedy not done,
The assassins continued, more pain they'd inflict,
The heart of the Pentagon would be their next hit,
Soon after brave passengers would falter their plan,
As their plane crashed down on Pennsylvania land,
Instead of the White House, believed the next site,
The eagle cried out as more people died...
---
Years gone by, the pain is still real,
But steadily God touches us, and we begin to heal,
We'll not ever forget, the memory lives on,
Our prayers continue, our faith keeps us strong,
With His Word to guide us, the horizon's in sight,
In spite of their efforts, together we'll fight,
No terror how great can make us divide,
Not even the day the eagle cried.

And THANK YOU:

To every past, present & future U.S. sailor, soldier, airman, marine, coast guardsman, police officer & firefighter. For all those who are gone, but not forgotten, and for the loved ones left behind. For all those who carry on to fight the good fight... For those who are often slighted despite their efforts,... GOD BLESS YOU!!

WE WILL BE HEARD!

2009-01-23T12:40:00.000-08:00

Copied from an earlier post:
"This campaign is committed to making the case for Lyme Disease heard by engaging your Governor, members of your State Senate, members of your State House, the President of the United States, members of the US Senate and members of the US House of Representatives.

The purpose of this petition is to make our voice heard in the fight against Lyme Disease. We need to establish as many signatures as we can muster in hopes to convince the Congressional Senators and House Representatives to see our movement through as they are the ones holding up the HR-741 and S-1408 Lyme Disease Bills in Washington DC.

WE INTEND TO BE HEARD."

New message: I just have to add one more--

In my last post, I shared my revision of the petition letter. I felt the need to personalize it and take a more dramatic approach. I was striving to electrify it-- I wanted it to jump off the page so hopefully it will really penetrate and they'll take notice. They need to realize that we do mean business. That this is an important and an extraordinary issue, we're passionate about it, and ultimately, WE WILL BE HEARD.

I want everyone to know that I did not share my version for any form of attention, but rather in hopes to inspire others. We need to stir the fire-- With every added voice, the sound gets louder and more impressive! WE WILL BE HEARD!

I entered mine last night, and my letter submission counted as #129..... I just checked again, and it doesn't appear there have been any new signers yet. I have emailed about 50 contacts-- I don't have nearly as many as I know most people do, but every person we can get to join us-- COUNTS! Lyme or not, pass this on... recruit, recruit, recruit!

C'mon, guys-- WE CAN DO THIS! It takes less than a minute to do your part. The site is set up so that all you have to do is enter in your information and hit "send". Eric Freedom already has his version pasted into the box. You can either leave it & submit his, or feel free to use mine as a template in place of it if you want a little more 'spice', LOL. Or, if you have the time & the drive, you can certainly write your own version.

But whatever action you choose to take, just take it, please--

If we don't take a stand, and do even this simplest form of activism, we are as guilty of idle contempt as they are. I realize that sounds caustic-- It's not intended to be. Just know I am trying to stir your hearts!

Please join us-- We NEED your voice! WE WILL BE HEARD!

http://healthcare.change.org/actions/view/lyme_disease_epidemic

(((BIG HUGS)))

Lend Us Your Voice!

2009-01-23T12:30:00.000-08:00

I feel passionate about this, and decided to rewrite the whole letter. Just wanted to share what I wrote & submitted:

Subject: Lyme Disease Pandemic

I am contacting you today because of an urgent and crucial matter: Lyme Disease.

It is pandemic and people are suffering due to poor recognition, uneducated & unwilling medical professionals, unreasonable insurance coverage, inadequate treatment protocols, and ultimately, neglect. Government action is required, and that response needs to be in the forms of providing the means for better awareness, more reliable testing, individualized and longer treatments, a stronger understanding of the disease by society in general, specific & required training of doctors and the entire medical community, and we need more clinical studies and grant financing to further indispensable research. These things are not an option, rather, they are imperative.

Lyme Disease is excrutiatingly painful and debilitating. Left untreated, it can cause it's sufferers irreversable damage including blindess, deafness, paralysis, deformities, brain damage and even death. Lyme is a relentless enemy demanding every ounce of it's host's energy, producing crippling languor and unrelenting pain & agony. It is an incapacitating affliction that depletes the entire body of valuable nutrients causing vitamin & mineral deficiencies, significant decreases in essential enzymes, causes blood sugar instability and seriously bankrupts vital hormones that are paramount to our well being. It drastically weakens our immune systems and robs us of the ability to repair & heal from wounds and other infections.

There are literally hundreds of conditions related to Lyme Disease. Compelling evidence shows that Lyme is being found to be the underlying cause in an alarming number of medical cases such as Chronic Fatigue Syndrome, Fibromayalgia, Bell’s Palsy, Parkinsons, Epilepsy, Lupus, Multiple Sclerosis, Scleroderma, Rheumatoid Arthritis, Hypothyroidism, Meningitis, Dementia, and Alzheimer’s Disease just to name a few.

Countless physicians have been abhorrently tormented, degraded & demoralized for their attempts in treating suffering Lyme Disease patients, as have scientists for their fundamental research because of a lack of bureaucratic acceptance that this disease not only exists, but is a phenomenal and devestating invader.

Lyme disease is not up for debate. People are wasting away while the CDC & IDSA look the other way. Because of the guidelines that are currently in place, millions of people, like myself, continue to suffer going undiagnosed, misdiagnosed or for being blatantly refused to even be seen by medical practitioners who swore a hippocratic oathe to do no harm yet their idleness does just that. Such is in my case. I was both mocked and evaded despite the fact that I met CDC guidelines for a clinical diagnosis of Lyme, complete with evidence of a erythema migran. I was told Lyme does not exist in my state, regardless of proof that it is, and not to come back if it had to do with Lyme Disease.

Lyme is an insidious disease. I urge you to view the documentary Under Our Skin by Open Eye Pictures, and then lend us your voice in the legislation.

Your citizens are crying out to their governent for help. What will your response be?

Our voices must be heard you guys,.. PLEASE send in your letter... you can write your own or use Eric's as a template, or even mine. Just please, PLEASE help us make a difference!!

http://healthcare.change.org/actions/view/lyme_disease_epidemic

(((BIG HUGS)))

HR-741 / S-1408 Lyme Disease Bills

2009-01-23T12:14:00.000-08:00

This campaign is committed to making the case for Lyme Disease heard by engaging your Governor, members of your State Senate, members of your State House, the President of the United States, members of the US Senate and members of the US House of Representatives.

The purpose of this petition is to make our voice heard in the fight against Lyme Disease. We need to establish as many signatures as we can muster in hopes to convince the Congressional Senators and House Representatives to see our movement through as they are the ones holding up the HR-741 and S-1408 Lyme Disease Bills in Washington DC.

WE INTEND TO BE HEARD.

Please join us:
http://healthcare.change.org/actions/view/lyme_disease_epidemic

Still Kickin'... I think.

2009-01-23T11:24:00.000-08:00

Well, it's been a little over a month since I last posted-- and now we're in a new year. 2009 already,.. where does the time go??

I'm not going to go into all sorts of details because I just don't have the energy, and what little stamina I do have left, I need to apply to other areas-- stay tuned, I'll be posting on one such element shortly.

Keeping this to a minimum, I will just say, that the end of December was difficult for us. Dec. 20th, we were awakened at 5:30 AM to find that our business was on fire. The aftermath was devestating, but a month later, we are somehow surviving and this just reaffirms my belief with all certainty that God is good, and reproves my profound reliance that He will always see us through every tribulation.

December 23rd also brought heartache as my grandmother, Mary, left this world. For me, and others in the family, the day was bittersweet because although it is always difficult to let a loved one go, we know in our hearts that she is in a better place. She is finally at peace, and for that, I am exuberantly grateful.

Leading up to these two events, I had about 3 weeks of good health where I felt better than I had in several months, although I was beginning to feel myself decline again. Lyme regenerates about every 28 days so I guess I was due to herx again, but the combination of the cold from the snow & ice storms and then with adding in both of the stressful circumstances that came about, it exasperated my condition. I was thrown into a tailspin, and despite my faith, I am only human. The body can only take so much and that brought on a feeling of immense despondence for which I had to take a step back and regroup. I had to reestablish my footing. The foundation was still there-- I was just feeling out of balance. But, at this stage in my life, I am of the acceptance that God designed me for adversity. I may not understand His reasoning, but I know there is a purpose-- and I will continue to do my best to serve His Will.

I'm Going to Bermuda!!

2008-12-15T13:49:00.000-08:00

Okay, I'm done.... Anybody want our snow?? It was beautiful at first, but now I'm FREEZING and feel like a human popcicle..... A ticket to Bermuda would be nice about now...Who's in??? LOL

HERE'S SOME MORE SNAPS FROM THIS MORNING. The girls tried to savor the snow because there's no telling how long it will last, but unfortunately for them, it's too icy & powdery now to make snowballs so all they could do is sling it at eachother, LOL,.. Courtney stayed inside & made pancakes,.. Britt & Ashley went outside to play, and then Brittney got it where it 'doesn't belong', and started jumping around trying to be free of it... Take a look at the pics, and you'll see what I mean. It lookd like she was bustin' out the moves at first,... then I quickly realized,.. she had snow down her pants, LOL! The pics say it all........ Have a look!

Winter Wonderland

2008-12-14T20:54:00.000-08:00

*BRRRR!!!* Baby, it's COLD outside!

We've got a few inches so far & it's still falling.... very pretty, but also very chilly. Scott ended up heading out earlier this evening to try to beat what he could of it. Once the top of the mustang was covered, we knew it probably wouldn't be a good idea for him to wait until morning when it will for sure be a sheet of ice out there. He did make it north safe & sound though. Meanwhile, my car quickly disappeared under the snowfall, LOL!

The girls were super excited and of course thoroughly enjoyed themselves....... then came in for hot cocoa in front of the fire & warm bubble baths, LOL! *wink*

Here's some snaps I grabbed tonight...

Happy Holidays

2008-12-14T10:37:00.000-08:00

With Love, from Scott, Tahnee,
Courtney, Brittney & Ashley!

Disney's Christmas Holiday Parade

2008-12-14T10:27:00.001-08:00

This is a Disney parade you can only see at Christmas time... I wish that our pictures had turned out better, but until I can upgrade my camera again, they'll have to do. It was a fantastic parade, and how excited we were to see Chip & Dale arrive in their little wind up car! Remember that little car?? Well, if you getting older like Scott & I are, and you grew up watching the old Disney cartoons, then you do. If you never saw them, or don't remember,.. even to all the young kiddies now, it was just too cute. All seven of the dwarves were there, too. I enjoy all the new Disney & Pixar characters, but the nostalgia of all the old, original characters adds that much more excitement for us! ;) We had a wonderful time, albeit COLD, it was worthwhile.

Pixie Hollow

2008-12-14T10:15:00.000-08:00

One of Disney's newest attractions that opened recently is Pixie Hollow. Shrink down to fairy size as you walk through tall grasses & flowers,... along the way, find a friend or two of Tink's! We found Silvermist...

And the star of Pixie Hollow,.... *Tinker Bell*, of course! :)

It's a Small World Christmas

2008-12-14T10:03:00.001-08:00

It's a Small World is all decked out for Christmas time! I have never seen it different before. It's looked the same for as long as I can remember. The first time I was at Disneyland, I was 9 years old, Ashley's current age. That was 25 years ago, and it still looked the same, LOL! But, for Christmas it gets an overhaul,.. decorations & music. It is a fun experience. I'm glad that we got to experience it in it's traditional manner, too, because we heard that there are plans to make some changes to the characters within Small World, to more Disney style characters, such as Lilo & Stitch in the hawaiin section and so forth. That will be cool, too, but I am glad to have gotten to see the traditional setting once more,... and decked out for Christmas. This was our first time experiencing Disneyland at Christmas time. :)

Pixar Play Parade @ Night

2008-12-14T09:51:00.000-08:00

For those who still follow this blog, you may recall this parade from when Brittney & I went on our mother-daughter trip to Disneland in May of this year. The pictures from that trip turned out much better because the parade was during the day. It was neat to see it at night, too. My camera hasn't been functioning as well at night or in low light, and movement only adds to the problem. So, these pics didn't come out as well, but we still like them. ;)

A Disneyland Christmas

2008-12-13T22:50:00.000-08:00

What a neat experience! I'll share a couple of more slide shows tomorrow of Small World all decked out for Christmas and the Disney Christmas Parade, but before I head to bed, here's one more. This is most of the rest of the pics from our week at Disneyland for the Christmas holiday season..... Much love & Have a good night! ;)

Jingle Bells @ Jelly Belly!

2008-12-13T21:50:00.000-08:00

Everybody knew how much President Ronald Reagan loved his jelly beans... Well, when I was in 1st grade, my class & I got to write him letters. In my letter, I asked him what his favorite flavor was. His favorite was licorice. Out of all the many flavors to choose from, and granted, there weren't nearly as many as there are today, but it was licorice. :)

Six Flags @ Christmas Time

2008-12-13T21:42:00.000-08:00

As you know, we got back from our holiday vacation a week ago. And as always, I have pictures to share. :)

The following are from our eveing at Six Flags for their Annual Holiday in the Park Festival. We only spent a couple of hours and just the one evening because it was so cold. We got season passes for 2009 so we'll be enjoying the park a lot more next year. We enjoyed ourselves while we were there though, and look forward to returning again soon.

Bad Apples

2008-12-13T11:38:00.000-08:00

There are some other things going on in my life right now, and have been, that I have been choosing not to post publicly on. Just know that there are things "behind the scenes" that need continued prayer for as well. Familial things outside of immediate..... my own personal. Another side of family that I just haven't been able to "let in". I try so hard to avoid conflicts and the people who contribute to them. I have been working to protect my children from all of that for the past 12 years...... ultimately, the wolf has come knocking at the door.

I have a responsibility to keep my family,.. my children safe. I am not at liberty to disclose all the information about this right now in order to help those who might follow this, to understand. You may contact me in private for that. Some people might say, "blood is blood", well, no, it's not..... we are all unique individuals in life and "blood" has absolutely nothing to do with character. You can be a good person or not....... we all have a choice. Our actions speak volumes about us, and I am not about to let certain history repeat itself.

I look at this situation, as this particular part of my family, being a bushel of shiny, green apples. But, even apples get worms and those worms can chew at the core........ they destroy the health of the fruit & it rots. Leave one bad apple, and it will slowly harm the rest. I can't have rotten apples in my life.

Busy Week

2008-12-12T16:46:00.000-08:00

Well, we've had another busy week, but I actually made it through pretty easily so it's been a nice change of pace. I'm tired at this point, but still doing well.

I really think that the new supplements are helping so I'm still anxious to start the next ones and hopefully continue to see more & more improvements, although I am still concerned about how I will respond to the abx treatments for the Lyme. A lot of people get worse before they get better, and can herx similarly to going through chemotherapy, but you never know, I may do alright since I'm in good hands with a great naturopath. I really think that when you treat the whole body, you have a better chance at making a stronger recovery. There may not be a cure, but it is possible to beat it into remission and hold it there..... that's my goal anyway.

I go back to the LLMD on Monday morning so I'll have a better update after that.

My eye appointment went well. Everything is pretty much the same so the eye pains and whatnot are most likely due to a combination between my thyroid levels being so messed up and of course the Lyme. My Rx is still the same, at least for long distance so I don't need to get new glasses for that, although he did the exact same thing again, and dilated my eyes before checking my near vision so I have to go back in to recheck that. Leave it to those KP doctors........ *rolls eyes* My optic nerves look good so we're not worried about the high-risk glaucoma category I fall into. I'm still testing high for pressure, but otherwise seem fine in that area.

Ashley had her well-checkup. I guess they still call it that even though she's 9 years old, LOL. She measured in the 25th percentiles for both height & weight. So that's come up from being in only the 5th percentile the last time she was checked. It is believed that it has everything to do with her NF. Shorter stature is common. It's been harder for her because both of her sisters have always been in the 95th percentile. Both, are a good foot taller than she is. They have been growing like weeds. I just do my best to keep her self-esteen built up and remind her how very special she is. That she's just exactly the way God made her, and some of the most wonderful things come in smaller packages. *wink*

Got my car!

2007-04-14T23:27:00.000-07:00

I bought my car today!! Got it for $3,000. LESS than the list price, too because the guy who was supposed to put it in the Auto Trader online ad, listed it wrong. I was stunned that they actually agreed to honor the price,........ Anyway, may not seem like a catch to others, but this is actually the car I wanted right now. Good, clean, reliable, safe, and gas efficient. I'm a heck of a happy gal. Here's a peek.........

Wii wants to play!

2007-04-15T11:48:00.000-07:00

Can I just say that the new Nintendo Wii is SUPER fun?!!

We FINALLY got our's Friday night, and although I can't play much right now due to my physical state *grumbles*,... it's awesome! Now this is a game system I can support,.. gets ya off your butt and you actually move more than your thumbs, LOL! And making your Miis is both fun & HILARIOUS!! We made them for each of the 5 of us, plus ones for both sets of grandparents, my sister and my neice, and it's just too darn funny how closely they all resemble each of us.

Three words: Wii IZ KEWL!!!

Got me a dyson!

2007-04-15T11:56:00.000-07:00

So, my vacuum decided to blow up on me a couple of weeks ago, and dang near caught fire,.. out of the blue, no warning, no nothing. It was second one of that model to do it,.. I finally have gotten sick of cheap vacuums, and splurged (dipped into some tax refund $, hehe), and got myself the ever coveted dyson.

I am now in vacuum HEAVEN!!!!!!

If you ever have the means,.. I HIGHLY recommend one.

15 Years & Counting...

2007-05-02T12:30:00.000-07:00

Just a short hour and a half from now, it will be official,... the 15 year milestone. It's the year of Crystal,... For me, this anniversary is much more than just a milemarker on the highway of married life. It's a renewal point. As many know, we've hit some pretty rough patches over the years, but have always persevered. We've always been stronger for it, however recently there have been certain issues in our relationship that had been at the root of many turbulent times, and had gone long over-looked, which led us to our separation in January. Technically, we are still separated, but this is temporary. Things are definitely headed in the right direction, and during this time we have worked hard at focusing our attention on keeping a strong friendship going, and rebuilding the companionship we had begun to lose the last few years. He has taken steps needed to work towards resolving the issues he needs to, and I am both impressed and appreciative of his efforts. He has pulled himself out of the dark place he had taken up residency in, and has been proving to me more & more that I matter, that we matter, and that he's willing to fight for us. To know that I am worth fighting for is huge. I still don't know where things will land, but as things sit right now, I have to wonder if I just might get my Happily Everafter, after all.........

So here's to marriage & miracles,.. to love, friendship, happiness & bliss,.. to another 15 years,........ Regardless of anything & everything,.. today, we are celebrating.

Below, is a memoir from our wedding that includes captions from our invitations. These are not the invitations themselves, but rather a piece of memorabilia...
The captions read:
"The most joyous of occasions is the union of a man and woman in celebration of life...

"Two lives, two hearts joined together in friendship, united forever in love...

"As our love unites us, may my family become your family, my friends, your friends..."

~~Mr & Mrs Robert Arthur Taylor~~
request the honor of your presence
to share in the ceremony of love
uniting their daughter
Tah-nee Antoinette
and
Mr. John Scott ~~last name~~
in holy matrimony
Saturday, the second of May
nineteen hundred and ninety-two
at two o'clock in the afternoon
Immanuel Lutheran Church
Knappa, Oregon

"On this day I will marry my friend, the one who shares my life, my dreams, and my love."

(Keep in mind, it was 1992,... we were barely out of the 80's, and the early 90's were still struggling with what was popular in fashion,... hence the haircuts, the colors, the dress/hat, our music "Almost Paradise"... we fit the times, I guess, lol)

Celebrating Fall

2007-10-31T23:18:00.000-07:00

Ah, our favorite time of year... Autumn. The glorious array of warm, rich colors that surround us as the crispness of the cooling air nips at your cheeks & nose, and the refreshing, healing rain that begins once again to fall down from God's sky to nourish all living things. I LOVE FALL.

This is how we chose to present our pumpkins this year...
(Top left: Brittney's, Top right: Courtney's, Bottom left: Mommy's and Bottom right: Ashley's)

ENJOY LIFE

2007-11-09T23:35:00.000-08:00

I know it's been a little while again since I've posted anything... once school got started, things got busier than ever, and then shortly after that, Mom (Carol) had been been doing so surprisingly well that she decided she wanted us all to try to take one more big vacation together. So we did! We spent 10 days together,.. only two on the road back & forth from home, and eight at various attractions/theme parks. I will post on the stops individually with favorite snapshots from each to share with you. Our first stop, was Knott's Berry Farm.

Before I post more photos, I would just like to note what an incredible blessing this trip was, and how fortunate we are that we got to go do this together, and experience the amazing things that we did... and all the unforgettable moments we got to share with her.

When she got out of the hospital the end of June, after being in there for a month & having surgery,.. she was taken off of chemo, put on medication & hospice, and basically told she'd be lucky to make it to August. The first two weeks home, looked pretty grim, but then suddenly her body perked back up. All that poison finally got out of her system from the chemo, and she actually got to feel pretty good for awhile,... and once again, longer than the doctors prognosis by a long shot.

She has begun going back downhill over the weeks since our return, and only the Lord knows how much time is left. But I am just so humbled by His grace, and so very, very grateful for all of the extra time he has given us these past 6 years, and especially this year. He has given us gifts beyond measure in the time we have had with her.

And, I just want to remind those out there who may also face a terminal illness that truly,.. People, God is the only one who knows how much time is left. Statistics are just numbers, and time & time again we have seen loved ones beat those odds. Surely, we have also watched as loved ones left us even faster than the time those statistics told us they might have, but I tell you this... We live on God's watch. Not the doctor's, not our own,.. We go when He says it's time. So don't give up. Give your dispair over to Him, and you fight! You never know what extra time He has planned for you,...

An Experience of a Lifetime...

2007-11-10T23:44:00.000-08:00

Some favorite pics from our days at SeaWorld-San Diego, October 8th & 9th. Please enjoy.

THANK YOU, MOM,... for a wonderful trip, and for the chance to share some AMAZING experiences with you. Especially this one... This picture has to be one of my very favorites. We will treasure these moments,.. these MEMORIES with you forever. I LOVE YOU.